Most of us have seen individuals who have appeared to have the ability to conquer any situation they are in, and always with the correct response. Their response was with nonflammable words, no accusations, calm, cool and smart, plus with a smile, seemingly added that everything is okay. Everyone is calmed, happy or at least satisfied with the results. Even if they themselves were less than controlled, and were belligerent.
Most of us did not obtain our emotional intelligence all at once, nor were we born with it. We had to learn how important it is first, and then work to become the person we described in the above paragraph.
Who Is Emotionally Intelligent, And What Is Emotional Intelligence In Simple Form?
It is usually someone who has taken the time to gain power over their emotions and responses without inflicting more chaos. You are emotionally intelligent when you possess the ability to see other people’s emotional needs over your own. We will also mention that these individuals make great leaders.
There are circumstances in life when a major or even minor event hits like a ton of bricks; especially one we are not expecting, we simply react to it without much thought. That react is not always what we would have wanted if we had the time to think about that reaction. There is not always a lot of thought process behind it. It is just something that can naturally occur without a thinking process. This is where emotional intelligence comes into play, and is something everyone should seek to have.
Emotional Intelligence (EQ): This is the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one’s emotions (positive emotions) and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.
“Emotional Intelligence is the key to both personal and professional success.”
Taking Control of Your Power
By thinking about how you want to react rationally, intelligently, and with more empowerment, you can better control how you are viewed by others. A knee-jerk reaction is a good thing in very few instances. When a difficult situation arises, it is always better to stop and think about what the appropriate reaction might be, or how you should react, or if you should react at all.
You can control your response to most things if you just take some time to think about your self-control. When you choose how you want to react to a situation, you hold all of the power at that moment.
“You can control your actions, re-actions, and responses more professionally if you program your mind to think before you speak.”
If someone does something with the intention of upsetting you or making you angry, learn to think slowly about your response. Let’s just say a friend who enjoys teasing you in front of others. It could be someone who tells you that you are too sensitive, and are not playful enough. Alternatively, they may speak about an event no one is supposed to know about, and they spill the beans. Being able to respond to it calmly takes away his or her power.
Emotional Intelligence At Work
There are times within a working environment that projects go haywire, and everyone becomes highly emotional, and afraid. Everyone’s thoughts are; here comes the blame game for something important having gone wrong.
This is where a leader performs their expertise in showing what true, sought-after leadership ability is. They keep calm, give the alternative solution, and/or benefits, and how to turn the unexpected around into something beneficial. No blame, no one made to feel inferior or lacking in ability. Just a solution, while moving forward and implementing a solution for not letting it happen again.
The things happening around you will no longer dictate your life when you learn to have control of yourself and your emotions. Nothing can make you feel a way that you do not want to if you work on your self-control. No one can control your emotions but you. By taking the reins, you can live a happier, more satisfying life by being able to look on the bright side of the other person’s little annoyances.
Immediate reactions can often be without reasoning, and those actions can leave you with regrets. It can leave you feeling socially unacceptable and can cause emotions you do not want to show. It can happen to anyone, at home, work, or with family, so we try to avoid the less-than-reasoned response. Every encounter we have leaves us an opportunity to learn the significance of responding with a clever reaction to whatever is before us.
It is known that individuals with emotional intelligence can interact with others more appropriately because they have studied themselves, and how emotions can affect everyone. In essence, this is what we are referring to when we talk about actions, reactions, and emotions.
This is something that takes practice, some thought, and one must know themself well to be able to guard themselves against others who can forget best practices while communicating. One must learn that quick responses only give way to more confusion and error.
It is important we do not leave our emotions wide open to those unexpected things where we lose our credibility for being smooth, calm, collected, and balanced.
Even with a confrontation of something we have not done or should have done; we must be front and center with respectful responses, tones of voice, even having empathy and consideration for the one leaving the offense. Insults are often part of life when you mingle in the public and to keep life calm we must be ready to counter the negative with positive responses, and actions.
This applies to everyday life because you never know when someone is having a bad day and needs to vent. If someone says something derogatory the best response is not to try to fight them. Just find a way to escape the situation safely, and know that you were the better person in that instance.
With the benefits of learning how EQ should work within your life, you will be equipped for those moments when you least expect the negative, and rise to the occasion of having the power to control how you respond.