When Your “What Ifs” Go Too Far

Motivational Monday here again…

When your what-ifs have gone too far is about giving too much thought to what could or could not happen within our life. These words can either give us the initiative to proceed or delay our actions. Caution is important when trying to make important life decisions. However, when we start and never stop with the “what-ifs,” our life can stop being productive, successful, and debilitate pressing forward. Most of us have used these words many times. However, there is a limit to worrying about the things we may have no control over.

Let’s Start With Me…

Here is what I know about how life can throw us into too much anticipation of the what-ifs. Since my son’s death from cancer, I sometimes allow myself to think that everyone left in my life is going to be gone also. Here I am feeling alone and wondering when my time will come. When my husband leaves the house, I ask God to take of him, I want to make sure he comes back home. As you know grief comes and goes and it affects individuals differently.

However, I also know that I cannot spend the rest of my life, whatever is left sitting around wondering if the next moment will be my last. If I were to do that, it would mean that my mind, body, and soul would have no requirement for my life to be productive. We fade away when we sit around examining all of the ‘what ifs.”

Does It Pay To Always Ignore Our “What Ifs?”

The answer to the question above is absolute no. Psychology tells us we all need to question ourselves about those things in life which are detrimental to our good living. Meaning sufficient enough to not make large mistakes…just like we must have a certain amount of “water” in our bodies to survive.

Another important word for our what-ifs is a constant worry. Some people worry about the rain, the traffic, the day to day things that happen that we have no control over. Those things are obviously not worth our mental anguish and should be very limited.

When our good life is about to be thrown into a million different directions, we need to take the time to contemplate if our decisions are in line with what is normal, just, and worthwhile. Very often we have seen that people often ignore the most important aspects of life, just to feel important, special, and excited.

When family life is about to be disrupted with a divorce, job change, a financial crisis, or a health issue, these are those things that need our “what ifs.”

Our Decisions Determine Our Destination But So Can Our What Ifs

Most of us have had times that we sat trying to make a decision yet, could not. If only I had more information or a vision, you think to yourself. Many times when you are avoiding making a decision, it stems more from being afraid of making the wrong decision. Those questions are some of the what-ifs in life.

This can become a recrudescence with undesirable results. This fear shuts down communication, creates more challenges, and generally comes with a high price tag. Anxiety, confusion, doubt, and even health issues.

“But what if my decision cost me my family’s well-being?” “What if I take that long-awaited course online, and it takes away from my children’s studies?” “If I change jobs and have to move out of town, will my family be happy?”

So, the individual wants to analyze everything to death before making the decision.

The Fear That Often Comes From the What Ifs and Worry

The fear of being wrong can cripple them into never making a decision, and stopping their fight for success. Yet, it is ok not to get it right each time. You may not be a spiritual person but the Bible indicates “there is a season for all things.” Making mistakes is about learning and growth, just as you did as a child, and just as you may tell your children.

You have more than likely seen the time you have wanted to step up and tell someone close to you that their decisions needed to be more focused on the final outcome. This was more than likely due to the fact that the person was one of those that does not contemplate what could happen.

We can call these individuals “fearless.” Yes, some people act before they think or consider the negatives results.  However, those with wisdom, know that life decisions need life-saving thoughts. Sometimes we say, “think before you leap” situations.

Humans, Persons of Power, Corporations, and Businesses

There is probably not a human, person of power, corporation, or business, who has not made enough mistakes to learn that at some point you must end the “what-ifs” and worry. A corporation cannot grow without some kind of final decision, and there must be people who can make those sound decisions without questioning them to death.

How did they get the experience?

Through making decisions and learning from their mistakes. They often state that you need to “fall forward fast”, learn what works and doesn’t work, learn from your mistakes, and move forward. While others are waiting until everything is perfect, they are succeeding with a wealth of experience and understanding behind them.

Many successful corporations just got their product and service out there and fixed things along the way as they received feedback from clients and customers. There are possibly others with similar products of much higher quality, but they never succeeded because they waited for everything to be right, while the decision-makers cornered the market.

What One Must Remember About Making Decisions and The What-ifs

It is important to remember that decisions, create more decisions in everyday life, work, and even play. Once you decide something, it can lead you to make decisions that are more informed. It is the same principle as energy begets energy. Getting started is the hardest process, but once you get going the momentum increases, and then things get easier.

If decisions still scare you start with something small and change your mindset to the possibilities that are positive.  Weed out the negative, but consider those also. Which is greater, the possibilities or the negatives?

Don’t have regrets, just learn from them and move forward. It could be as simple as what to have for breakfast. Decide quickly and if it wasn’t the best decision, so what, you learned something. Another meal is soon approaching giving you more opportunities to decide. Then expand to more and more important issues, while you discover your inner power and control over your own life.

Remember, you are already on your way. After all, you decided to read this.





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